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It's the Big Joyous Celebration, Let's Stir the Honeypot

by teen suicide

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1.
04:28
a steady check, my old dead pets, a well lit room with soothing off white walls I'm sober now, it's been a while, everything feels like the first time I pick a fight I know I'll lose, a steady head since I was a kid & if all we get is all we get then that's all we’ll get, goddamn I guess that's it
2.
oh let’s stir the honeypot depression is a construct heaven is a package deal you don’t need proof to know it’s real
3.
02:46
Alex is the best when she wants to die the whole world sits and waits until she doesn't want to die we're both only sixteen skipping class to smoke weed in her brother's house we saw it on tv and the light comes through the window and shines off the stem of her brothers crackpipe Alex is my friend we meet up after school her brother knows a guy who can sell me lots of pills lying on her back she says she wants to die then she buys a gram of coke and she doesn’t want to die summer storm makes for a blackened sky I wonder where Alex is tonight
4.
01:42
“I dream about being with you while you're doing the laundry in the shade of an oak tree you see right through me someone calls me a liar but I'm covered in violets you mean the world to me don't ever let them tell you different”
5.
02:33
take a picture of me in front of the tv words besides heartbreak today escape me pick up your pills at the grocery store one pack of sugar they're turning the bay into a graveyard it's the county connector break break break obvious love
6.
where do your loyalties lie? and who gets my royalty checks when I die? I should call my lawyer, I should drink more water I haven't been to church in a while do you wanna come over? I've got 3 Netflix accounts and we can watch a different show on each screen you always see right through me, what if we wrote a movie? how funny would that be you know the flares they fire from sinking ships? I haven't felt like this in a while I guess that I should sing it but I'm scared my heart's not in it it's just a pop song it's just a pop song it feels underwhelming do you believe in heaven? it's just a pop song it's just a pop song what if I move to Boston? should I go on Suboxone? it's just a pop song it's just a pop song what do you want for dinner? we broke up in November it's just a pop song it's just a pop song
7.
02:07
I wanna be a V.I.P. I wanna feel adored I wanna be the most valuable player I wanna feel like somebody’s baby I wanna be someone’s breadwinner I wanna know that my heart’s still in it I wanna be somebody’s darling would you live in a house this haunted?
8.
I’m bored by love some idea of wild thing runs free what could it mean to me? this is all I’ve got, it's all I've got do a watercolor of the cat on the front porch how do you keep talking when your language is dying? this is all I've got, it's all I've got
9.
I’m in the shallow dark water again three movies a day in bed I’d love it if you picked me up in your new bright blue pickup truck afraid of the way my hands move I think might quit my job “Luke's coming by after work and he's bringing some friends along" it's a bright blue miracle
10.
01:13
why do I make so much noise when I want to live so quietly? if I don’t think it should taste sweet then it doesn’t taste like anything it’s over – sometimes that’s all it takes it’s over, it was a big a mistake it’s over – sometimes that’s all it takes it’s over, it was a big mistake
11.
i'm lying in the backyard all alone i'm lying in the sun (??) and let the light into the house I don't know about you (?) maybe it's not right for me either (??) someone will give you what you want I don't know what I get from all of this i don't know why I ?? maybe I'm scared of what I might find if I stop let the light into the house ?? why do I make so much noise when I (??) I guess it makes a lot of sense I guess it makes a lot of sense someone to give you what you want
12.
02:00
“I don't feel safe in the city”, I don't feel safe in my body, assume everything is a warning it's raining, it's raining - it's storming I got a text from a really old friend they gouged out her eyes in a dream she had she worries about premonitions we've always been superstitious I throw on a jacket in Edmondson my mom stopped taking her medicine I pick her up cigarettes & diet coke make two more calls & I'm on the way home with God as my witness and God as my only friend I never thought that I'd see you around here again with God as my witness and God as my only friend will we be this bored when the world ends?
13.
riding bikes down the street in the rain what do you make of his face? looks like an old friend of mine come to see me again never close, we had had mutual interests a beneficial relationship there's jail time in the future for him but he doesn't know about it Nick is sick, he needs it quick we let him fix up in the car catching up with my old friends that's what the holidays are for his kid's in jail & he won't post bail so he can sell his script when we ask he says he went home to see his mom for the week but we keep going back buying drugs from Taylor's dad
14.
how do I feel like my time’s not wasted like my heart’s not breaking every time I watch you trying to put on your shoes, or send a text message? I have to tap the brakes just to have a conversation
15.
02:12
I'm waiting for you to call my name
16.
02:00
it's not art unless you laugh one of these days I'm gonna laugh it's a long way down, I know that now driving around while it rains just to get out of the rain I've got nothing on my brain you've got a lot to say and that’s ok I just need some time to myself these days sing about who broke your heart I don't believe in art I'm not mean I've just got no time pavement were an ok band but you don't gotta sound like them you were two when cut your hair came out you've got a lot to say and that’s ok I just need some time to myself these days
17.
02:36
you're so pretty when you look at me in the mirror in a dimly lit room, a blood red bathroom how old were you when you first fell out of love with the world? where do you want to live? what do you want to be? I want to live in a beautiful house in America a beautiful home in America
18.
03:12
write a love song once in a while I swear it will make you feel so ordinary cosplay at my funeral talk to the dead show your devotion to the things you love the devil is a man with a big white smile an imposing voice and a great hairstyle, he always looks you right in the eyes the devil is a man with a great hairstyle a soothing voice and a perfect smile he always looks you right in the eyes show your devotion to the things you love
19.
all forms of desire have left this body now this feels so tired white room, empty house what if my heart's not in it? it could happen to me what would you do if the things you loved were killing you? what day will they choose when the earth decides to cut me loose? in an auditorium? taking methadone with my friends? or beside a lake with my dad in 96? I hope I get choices the things I love are killing me now
20.
I've been here before the same flowers for a year or more under a sky so blue I don't mind in a darkened car under a sky with no stars I kiss you just because you want me to I don't mind I can't stop you falling out of love with me slowly glowing from the bloom let the light in to the room lying in bed, march 26th, you run your hands over my ribs oh, I guess this is heaven I can't stop you falling out of love with me
21.
sleeping with you on the couch was the best I've felt in months you know you're my family until the day that all my blood stops running & my heart gives up, they find me in the bathroom tied off or like Jason on the kitchen floor chain lock on the door & receipts on the table twelve unread emails I was going through withdrawal in a mall I threw up in the food court waiting on a call to come through and the more half-baked romantic part of my brain told me that that was the thing to hold on to is it too late? were the best times of my life mistakes? I owe a lot of apologies, and I wish I’d made some of them sooner should’ve spent more time around mountains and trees I should've moved back out of the city I wish I'd read more of the books I bought unless heaven is as boring as we always thought then I hope they let me read all of the books I brought
22.
enjoy it while it's here cause it won't last long if it's not the end of summer it's the angry hand of God I'm getting pretty tired of talking you down thought that I'd give that up by now if you wanna come visit it's a long way down I'd move to the city if I thought I'd make it out but you're getting pretty tired of talking me down I thought that you'd give that up by now my dealer bought a car now he comes over to my house he tried to buy my car but I told him no so he bought another car now he comes over to my house now I don't really need my car anymore if you wanna come & visit it's a long way down you're a boring kid and you're never gonna get anything that you deserve I know this life's gonna treat you alright but with any luck the next one's gonna hurt you're a spoiled kid and you're never gonna get anything that you deserve I know this life's gonna be just fine but with any luck the next one's gonna hurt
23.
sorrow, in my little world please pass me over come over me you don't know what's done it's all that's left let's turn it red let's turn it blue I come across, looming, trembling at the sight of you
24.
I see your shape outlined in a darkened room no matter where, I stare maybe it's the world as far as I can see little machines, whirr whirr whirring on a cold day I can hear the sound of birds in the speakers, singing a hurricane, the coming hurricane falling down and getting up again let the water rise and be push & shove & comfort me come for me , you’ll come for me spread a map for eyes that see release the wind, release the fog the world will be a waterfall the rocks beneath will catch it all
25.
will I rest my head in heaven or will I sleep in the stomach of the earth? I'm not afraid of what might happen getting dressed for work I’m crying through my haircut deep in the stomach of the earth a quiet day, I show up drunk to the bank of America the viciousness of the glee club was legendary the kind of thing you tell stories of for the next few centuries I watched the beauty of the world condensed tipping too much on a twenty dollar check
26.
I can't find the book I’m reading I don't know where I set it down then I remember that you took it when you left & moved out hi love, it's been a while since we were here Mick Foley, Tietam Brown one dvd, 1000 Clowns a roll of quarters, Xanax bars one envelope, four hundred dollars hi love, it's been a while since we were here if I don't see you before you leave take care of yourself for me my mom told me to say hi she doesn't care you're getting high hi love, it's been a while since you were here

about

Teen Suicide – It's the Big Joyous Celebration, Let's Stir the Honeypot
All music and lyrics written by Sam Ray except “The Hurricane”, co-written with Spencer Radcliffe. Trumpet on ‘Living Proof’ played by Max Kuzmyak. Additional vocals on ‘Living Proof’ provided by Sean Mercer. Drums on ‘Living Proof’ played by Sean Mercer. Additional vocals on ‘The Big Joyous Celebration’ provided by Harmony Tividad, David Courtright, Neil Sanzgiri, Alec Simke, Kinsey Matthews, Elizabeth Sea, Owen Pallett, Josephine Ray, Spencer Radcliffe, Sean Mercer, John Toohey, and Caroline White. Additional Guitar on ‘Alex’ provided by John Toohey. Drums on ‘Alex’ played by Sean Mercer. Bass on ‘Alex’ played by Alec Simke. Additional Vocals on ‘Violets’ provided by Harmony Tividad. Additional percussion on ‘Obvious Love’ provided by Mat Cothran and Delaney Mills. Additional Vocals on ‘It’s Just a Pop Song’ provided by Lexi Williams, Caroline White, Spencer Radcliffe, and Mat Cothran. Production & drums on ‘Wild Thing Runs Free’ provided by Mat Cothran. Additional vocals on ‘Bright Blue Pickup Truck’ provided by Harmony Tividad. Additional instrumentation & production on ‘Bright Blue Pickup Truck’ provided by Dexter Tortoriello. Bass on ‘What You Want’ played by Alec Simke. Bass on ‘God’ played by Alec Simke. Drums on ‘God’ played by Eric Livingston. Additional vocals on ‘God’ provided by Caroline White. Additional vocals on ‘Neighborhood Drug Dealer’ provided by Harmony Tividad & Spencer Radcliffe. Drums on ‘Devotion’ played by Eric Livingston. Bass on ‘Devotion’ played by Alec Simke. Additional vocals on ‘I Don’t Think It’s Too Late’ provided by Madeline Ava.
Drums on ‘Long Way Down’ played by Sean Mercer. Additional vocals, keyboards, drums, lyrics, and all horns on ‘The Hurricane’ provided by Spencer Radcliffe.
All songs recorded by Sam Ray except ‘Living Proof’, ‘Alex’, and ‘Long Way Down’, all recorded, engineered, and mixed by Sean Mercer.
Thank you to everyone involved and everyone who helped in any way.

Copyright 2016 Run For Cover Records

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released April 1, 2016

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teen suicide Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Making Music Now under the name "American Pleasure Club" (though the band itself has not changed - just the name) you can find us at that bandcamp.
Follow us on twitter at @fugazi420 for updates, tour info, release news, & to connect with us.



booking - ghorbal@apa-agency.com
general contact/inquiry - hhhhsamray@gmail.com (ask for Sam)
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